It's Okay to Not Be Okay
Ever felt completely lost, afraid, and lonely? Well, you’re definitely not alone. One of the biggest things I will repeat time and time again is this: it’s okay to not be okay.
If there’s one message I wish I could engrain in every person who struggles with mental health, it’s this. It’s okay to not be okay.
I want to start by normalizing that feeling—and validating you, the reader:
According to the World Health Organization, nearly 1 in 8 people globally—around 970 million—were living with a mental disorder as of 2019, and that number has only risen since the pandemic. So no, you’re not alone.
Having to present a perfect image to everyone around us can be exhausting. It’s in our human nature to have ups and downs. You don’t have to please others before yourself. You don’t have to make everyone else happy while neglecting your own needs.
It’s okay to not be okay.
Personal Experience
When I was younger, I wasn’t proud of how I handled my emotions—but that’s all I knew at the time.
Now, looking at my more recent self, I’ve realized how deeply I fell into people-pleasing. I constantly put others’ happiness before my own, even when it destroyed me. I wore a mask so others couldn’t see my true emotions—and I hurt for that version of me.
At one point, I truly believed it was better for me to suffer quietly, as long as the people around me were okay.
And while it might sound cliché, one day I did wake up and decide: “This is not who I want to be anymore.”
After carrying that burden for so long, I finally put myself first—and it felt like the world shifted.
I began to understand people differently, and for the first time, I stopped letting everyone walk all over me. It’s not a perfect story, and I’m still learning, but if you haven’t had that moment yet—your time will come.
So be honest with yourself. Don’t be afraid to be who you truly are, no matter what society says.
The Harder Moments
In one of my earlier posts, I mentioned withdrawing from college during a really low point.
At the time, I felt like a complete failure. I’d run into family at events, paste on a smile, and quietly say I was “taking a break” when they asked how school was going. Inside, I was embarrassed—more than anything, I just wanted their acceptance and to make them proud.
The same would happen when I ran into old classmates or coworkers. I couldn’t help but compare myself, thinking they had “moved ahead” in life while I was stuck.
But here’s the truth: comparison is the thief of joy—and it's okay to admit how you're really feeling.
I wish I had been more honest in those moments, but I’ve learned everything happens for a reason.
The Healing Journey- Progression
Healing is a long, deeply personal journey. I don’t know how you feel about this, but for me, it might be a process that never really ends—and that’s okay.
The first step is acceptance. That’s what I’ve been trying to do with so many moments in my life: understand them, and let them be part of my story.
But healing does not mean pretending everything is fine. So again, I’ll say it: it’s okay to not be okay.
Even just six months ago, I was much more hesitant to speak openly about my mental health. Now? I want to start a blog. I want to share my story. I want others to read this and know that vulnerability is not weakness. If I’ve made it through hard days, you can too.
I know nothing in life is perfect, but I encourage you to find comfort in what you have.
Remind yourself to appreciate the little things—even something as simple as having a warm meal tonight. Practice gratitude. It helps, especially when the world feels heavy.
Final Thoughts
It’s okay to not have everything figured out. That’s a hard pill to swallow, but here’s the truth: nobody does.
The people around you? They’re probably struggling too—they just don’t advertise it.
Be kind to your mind. It works hard for you.
If anything I’ve shared resonates with you, and you haven’t already, please—talk to someone.
It helps in a way you may not fully understand yet. Find your support person.
Go to sleep without the pressure to be perfect. Share your story if it lightens your load, like I’m doing right now.
One thing I encourage you to do if able is to pay it forward with kindness, no matter how small or large the gesture.
And lastly—you are not alone.
There is someone out there who would give anything to be in your position, or just to hear your story.
So please, remind yourself every day: it’s okay to not be okay.